


As Close As It Gets

by angelus2hot



Category: Angel: the Series
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Community: nekid_spike, Explicit Sexual Content, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 17:40:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6385924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelus2hot/pseuds/angelus2hot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU(ish) Set many months after the Angel the Series Season 5 Episode A Hole In The World. Spike and Wesley discover their need for each other as Spike helps Wesley through the grieving process.</p>
            </blockquote>





	As Close As It Gets

**Author's Note:**

> **Title:** As Close As It Gets  
>  **Fandom:** Angel the Series  
>  **Characters/Pairing:** Spike/Wesley Wyndam-Pryce  
>  **Rating:** NC-17  
>  **Word Count:** 2,151  
>  **Summary:** AU(ish) Set many months after the Angel the Series Season 5 Episode A Hole In The World. Spike and Wesley discover their need for each other as Spike helps Wesley through the grieving process.  
>  **A/N:** written for spikesjojo at [nekid_spike](http://nekid-spike.livejournal.com/)

“Are you drinking again?” Spike stared through the darkened room at Wesley sitting slumped on the sofa in his office with a glass in his hand.

The whiskey burned his throat as he tossed his head back and drained the glass. “I just want the pain to stop.” 

“It doesn’t matter whether that person has died or walked out on you nothing in this world is going to ease the pain of losing someone you love. Nothing that is but time.” Spike shrugged his shoulders. “And a lot of times not even then.”

“So what am I supposed to do? Pretend she didn’t mean everything to me?” Wesley reached for the bottle sitting on the table. “She was the love of my life and Gunn got to spend more time with her than... He got to...” He swallowed hard fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. “He got to love her longer.” Wesley knew he sounded bitter but at the moment he just couldn’t find it in himself to give a damn.

The bottle was at his lips almost before he finished speaking. He’d quickly abandoned the glass and all pretense of trying to be civilized. Neither death, nor grief was civilized so why should he pretend he was? Besides alcohol was the only thing that even remotely helped to dull the pain.

Spike stared down at Wesley, a sad shell of the man he used to be. Months had passed since F... He quickly shook his head to stop the thought. He wouldn’t, he couldn’t think of her name if he did it made her being gone seem so much more real to him. “There is one thing that might work.” Even as he told himself it was too soon he couldn’t stop the words from falling from his lips. Spike knew he shouldn’t but he’d wanted Wesley for a long time and there was no way he couldn’t take the opportunity that had presented itself. 

“I thought you said nothing would help.” His tone was dull and lifeless as he brought the bottle to his lips once more.

“Well, it’s not so much it’ll help but it will make you forget for awhile.” Spike was sure he shouldn’t have said anything. He knew it was too soon but he couldn’t stand to see the man he wanted beyond everything to suffer any more than he already had. He was positive he could make Wesley happy... if he’d let him. And if that meant he had to go the route of friends with benefits first than that’s what he would do. “I can make you forget.”

Wesley raised his head and stared in Spike’s direction. He could barely make out the silhouette of the blonde vampire but the room seemed to hum with his presence. _Why couldn’t he just get to the point?_ There was another bottle of whiskey tucked in his desk that was calling his name. Although he would hate to admit it he couldn’t help but be curious. “How?”

Spike’s voice was like smooth whiskey sliding through every part of Wesley’s body with a slow burn as he whispered, “Guess.” 

Wesley swallowed hard the sound echoing in the quiet room.

Nothing but silence stretched between them until finally it dawned on Wesley exactly what Spike had meant. His mouth popped open in shock. “Do you honestly think I could...?

Before Wesley could finish Spike interrupted. “It was just a thought.” He wasn’t about to force the other man into anything. These days he didn’t have a bloody chip to stop him from doing something he really wanted to do no matter how wrong it was, no he had something much worse, his conscience. It came with getting his soul back. A sigh swept through him. Sometimes he really missed the good old days. “I’ll leave you to it then.” Without another word he turned and walked towards the door. He’d barely made it out of the door before the sound of Wesley’s voice made him poke his head back in the room. “Did you say something?”

Wesley drained the last of the contents of the bottle and with a nod of his head he gave in and repeated, “Okay.”

With a sexy smile on his face, Spike walked into the room and leaned his head to the side. “You sure?”

Although he couldn’t see it, he could almost feel the triumph coming from Spike. But he wasn’t going to worry about that now. He just wanted a few minutes of not being able to feel this crippling pain and if it came at the hands of Spike then so much the better. “Yes.”

Silently Spike shut the door behind him making sure it was locked before he walked toward Wesley. “The first thing we’re going to do is get rid of this.” He reached between Wesley’s legs and grabbed the almost empty whiskey bottle and set it on the table. “And now...” He walked behind Wesley. 

“Spike, I don’t think..”

“That’s right. Don’t think. Just feel.” Spike slowly began to trace Wesley’s face with his fingertips, across his cheeks, his lips and down his neck before grasping Wesley’s shoulders in his hands. Without a word his fingers dug into the tense muscles of his shoulders.

It wasn’t long before a loud moan echoed around the room. 

“Stand up.” He waited until Wesley did as he was told.

Every cell in his body, every single inch of his skin tingled from just being this close to the blonde vampire. It wasn’t fear. No, even at his youngest, his most naive, Wesley had had too much bravado to show fear of Spike. And like this, alone in the dark with a vampire with a soul, one who wasn’t afraid to show himself for what he was... it was odd this was where Wesley felt the safest.

Spike tucked his fingers underneath Wesley’s stubbled chin and pulled forcing the man to look him in the eyes. “None of that now. Be with me.”

Wesley nodded his head shutting off all thought other than the vampire in front of him.

“The next thing we’re going to do is get you out of these clothes.” 

Within minutes both men stood naked in front of each other, their clothes lying scattered on the floor at their feet.

“Do you want me?” Spike leaned forward and nibbled Wesley’s mouth, his sharp teeth worrying the bottom lip.

Wesley spluttered a weak “Yes” falling from his lips.

“Oh, no, pet. I think you can do better than that.” His fingers caressed the side of Wesley’s neck before sliding down to caress his chest, his stomach and down further until....

“Yes.” Wesley groaned loudly, his voice hoarse with desire as Spike’s fingers teased the head of his cock. For a brief moment he couldn’t help but stiffen as Spike’s other hand slid down his ass. It didn’t take long before Wesley was panting his hips gyrating as Spike gently prepared him for his possession.

“Bend over.”

He obeyed without a word.

“Good boy.” 

The words of praise went straight to his groin as Spike’s cock began to glide inside of him. 

Wesley pushed back against Spike demanding more and that was all the encouragement Spike needed. His hands grasped Wesley’s hips as he began to pump his cock deeper and deeper inside of him.

His arms trembled from the force of Spike’s thrusts. 

Spike’s cock was buried deep inside of him; his balls slapped against his ass with every thrust and God help him he wanted more. Faster, deeper, harder, he wanted everything Spike could give him.... He needed it.

“Raise up.” The words were guttural but somehow Wesley understood them.

“Why?” The question escaped through clenched teeth as he pushed back against Spike forcing him to go deeper. There was no way he wanted to leave this position. It felt too damn good. His orgasm hovered just out of reach and with a little more he was positive he could...

A loud growl cut off his thoughts and echoed through the room as Spike’s fingers dug into tender skin. “Because it will be better.”

 _Better?_ Without another word of protest Wesley carefully raised up until his back was flush against Spike’s chest.

He had barely got into position before Spike had pulled him tighter against his body, his arm a steel band around Wesley as his other hand snaked around his waist caressing his stomach before sliding downwards until at last his fingers curled around Wesley’s engorged cock. 

Wesley’s eyes rolled back in his head as Spike slowly began to run his fingers up and down the length of his cock. His head fell back against Spike’s shoulder as a whimper escaped him before he could stop it. He needed this, needed Spike so badly. It was all he could do not to beg. 

Sharp fangs scraped against his skin and for a moment he froze. He hadn’t planned on this part. The truth be told he hadn’t given much thought to anything besides the way Spike’s cock was making him feel buried deep inside of him. But this... Was he ready for this?

“I’m not hungry.” He smiled as he felt Wesley relax against him. “I’m just....” Once again Spike raked his fangs against Wesley’s neck. “Staking my claim.”

The words hung in the darkness surrounding them waiting for acknowledgement. 

_Staking his claim? What the hell was that supposed to mean?_

Before Wesley could say anything Spike continued, “Do you honestly think anyone else could make you feel the way I can.” A deep snarl vibrated through his chest as he fisted Wesley’s cock. “Do you think I would allow that?” 

A thrill shot through Wesley. He wasn’t sure if it was the way Spike’s hand was squeezing his cock or his words that he liked the most. “Spike, I...”

“Shhh. No talking.” He squeezed harder, his thumb teasing the head of Wesley’s cock on every up stroke. “Just feel what I alone can do to you.”

Spike thrust deeper and deeper into the tight, hot depths of Wesley’s ass wringing deep groans and soft moans from the man in his arms. Each sound brought him closer and closer to his own orgasm. 

“Spike.” The name a litany on his lips as fire burned through his veins consuming everything in its path. Without a word he leaned his head to the side. 

The vampire bit down, pulling the soft skin into his mouth careful not to pierce the skin with his fangs. He didn’t want Wesley to think he wasn’t a man or at least a vampire of his word.

The feel of sharp teeth against his skin as Spike sucked his neck while his hand caressed his cock keeping perfect timing with the cock thrusting in his ass was more than Wesley could take. With a shout his orgasm burned through him leaving nothing but ashes and his body spent.

A growl escaped Spike as he pushed Wesley over, with his head lying on his arms on the couch and his ass high in the air he was like an offering from the gods. One Spike was more than happy to receive. 

His fingers gripped Wesley’s hips, his nails leaving half moon marks in the tender skin but he was beyond caring. All that matter was the feel of being deep inside of Wesley his ass clamped tight around him milking his cock. His balls tightened against his body as the force of his orgasm slammed through him almost bringing him to his knees. He bit his lip to keep Wesley’s name from escaping his mouth as he shot his semen deep inside of the man beneath him.

Spike leaned over Wesley’s back, his tongue licked drops of sweat from his back. He smiled against his skin as Wesley shivered at the contact.

As Wesley lay in Spike's arms trying desperately to get his breathing under control he felt the guilt of having given in to his need for a moment without grief and worse much worse his deeply hidden desires for Spike.

Spike could feel the tension beginning to take hold of Wesley, he quickly curled his body around him, tightening his arms. "None of that. No regrets."

For a brief moment he stiffened and then with a sigh Wesley nodded. He didn't have it in him to argue not with Spike and certainly not with himself any longer. No matter how much he tried to kid himself, he wanted the blonde vampire just as much as he wanted him.

Spike softly kissed the back of Wesley’s neck and smiled as he felt the man shiver in his arms. He knew without a single doubt that this was as close as he would get to heaven. And that was perfectly okay with him. It was as close as he would ever need.


End file.
